Devotional | LOVE LETTER TO A SLOW LEARNER – PART TWO

You can read part one here

As I wrote in my last blog post, slowing my physical pace and cutting down on the number of activities I was involved in wasn’t the silver bullet to finding genuine rest or peace. Why? Because my mind needed to slow down too – and given my head is a place where clutter and chaotic thoughts compete for attention, that was easier said than done.

I have never known a quiet mind. It is rare for me to have a single thought at once. Once upon a time I was so across everything, I was a multitasking queen – I could wrangle a busy brain full of thoughts and tasks and dates and didn’t need a calendar or a to-do list. My memory was reliable and sharp.

But the march of time ushered in menopause, bringing brain fog and forgetfulness along for the ride. The contrast was stark – did I have early onset dementia? And then my adult daughter was diagnosed with ADHD. Surely not? My picture of ADHD was little boys causing havoc and always being in trouble because they couldn’t settle to anything. This was the opposite of my daughter’s childhood. But my daughter’s hyperactivity was in her brain – her busy, anxious brain. I did a lot of research into ADHD to try and understand it better and it did explain many facets of her childhood behaviour that had left us as parents scratching our heads. I wish I had known and understood, I could have helped her more.

I was still unprepared for the day however, when she told me she thought I had it too. Me?

To cut a long story short, yes – me. I have joined the swelling ranks of women being diagnosed in later life. What was I to do with this diagnosis? I took it to God – I’m supposed to be fearfully and wonderfully made, right? How does this fit with ADHD? It’s like I’m set up to never find peace or rest.

His response was to assure me that I needed peace and quiet more than other people – and He had intentionally made me that way – because when I sought peace, I was seeking Him. That made a huge difference. But He didn’t leave me there. He reminded me of Psalm 46:10 – the seemingly impossible “Be Still and Know That I Am God”.

For me, being still long enough to know He is God is an agonisingly tough ask. But this time He gave me some instructions.

“I want you to immerse yourself in that verse”.

And there began the most wonderful journey for me.

I began to look at how many ways I could see this verse in front of me – I wanted it to be everywhere. I took my assignment seriously. I had great fun on Canva finding beautiful images, adding the scripture to it and laminating them for display all around my house. Stickers on my mirrors. A coffee mug, a t-shirt, a journal cover. Instead of having my name etched on a set of lead pencils, I ordered BE STILL AND KNOW. Bookmarks, a pencil case, a great magnetic sign that attaches to my rangehood and dominates my kitchen eyeline. God’s word to me is literally everywhere I go.

I also made up a Spotify playlist full of songs with ‘be still’ in the title or featuring prominently in the lyrics. At first, I assumed every song called Be Still listed in my search results was the same one, but no! There are so many, and every time I listened to one, it was feeding my spirit. Every time I googled the scripture to find inspiration for new ways to display it, I was repeating it over and over again in my head. I was immersing myself in it.

If I am having a challenging day, often times He will whisper to me to put on my playlist – or I will catch sight of the scripture from one if its many homes around me and repeat it – slowing my breathing and remembering with relief and gratitude the One who has given it to me. It is actually Philippians 4:8 at work – I am choosing something true, noble, right, pure, lovely,
admirable, excellent and praiseworthy and thinking on it.

I am still a work in progress, but despite the menopause and the ADHD, God is showing me that I can be the most peaceful I have ever been if I am willing to immerse myself and follow Him.

What scripture would God have you immerse yourself in today? I’d love to hear – and please share your creative ideas so we can encourage each other!